the chick magnet

I was complaining about how the phone rings often with one person or another who ISHI has helped out in the past. Well, actually, it was that I missed my friend T’s phone call, because I was on the phone with someone else with a problem and chose to ignore one call that showed up on the Caller ID. I didn’t bother to look at the Caller ID for the second call right in a row, since I was sure that it was the same woman calling back, since that’s her MO. She calls and calls and calls, never thinking that we wouldn’t pick up her call on purpose (thank you, technology!)

No, it was T calling, telling me she’d be over in a little while. When she showed up, I was surprised. “I called and left a message.”


And that’s when I explained to her how ISHI is always getting these calls. I’ve written about how he is working with so many people right now, mostly with family problems. (I can assure you that this is nothing like “women problems”, or “that time of the month”.) So many people’s lives are just a mess, basically.

Each case is obviously different, but you can and should draw conclusions from the overall atmosphere.

Oh–the title? That’s what T said.

“He’s a chick magnet.”

It’s true. It’s mostly women who call him.

I guess we could say that they’re the canaries in the mine.


Yes, actually, the one who was calling and I was not answering was a down-and out woman, not even from our community, who was looking for another handout. Rachmoniss (’tis a pity). But mostly, they’re the ones that recognize that their relationships are in trouble. Or they’re the ones that choose to do something about it. After all, women are still more defined by their relationships than men are. So a man can have a really messed-up home situation and be extremely successful in his profession. I guess women can and should, too, but I think they’re not as easy to box things out. Is that being sexist of me or just realistic? Yes I know plenty of women who are clueless or who do not tie pieces together (and sometimes that’s how they get stuck in the messes that they want/need my husband to fix/clean up for them). But for whatever combination of reasons (women are dealing more with the children, they are not as afraid to ask for help, they have a stronger sense of what marriage should be, they listen to the words of Peggy Lee’s “Is That All There Is?” and wonder what where they are and how they got there)…

Here’s a version of Bette Middler sing the song.

So kitchen dancing, anyone?


3 responses

  1. Pingback: how late would you call a rabbi? | But Mostly Hers

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