Happy Adar, everyone. The following is another example of how we can’t take ourselves so seriously, even if we should be taking other things much more seriously.
The husband had received an email about how there is not enough seriousness in our shul’s davening. So many people take every opportunity to talk and are not even careful enough to be brazen; they take it as their G-d-given right. Something had to be done about it.
Point well-taken. I will add, as an aside now, that I notice that most of the talkers are FFB’er’s and talk just like their parents talked. And those of us who are more serious are the ones who got into this business on our own. This is a generalization, and as with all such, there are exceptions to the rules going both ways.
And there was another problem in the past few weeks that showed that people in our shul don’t take halachah seriously enough in general, so since there wasn’t a simchah this Shabbos, it was time for some mussar. And he wrote something up, toned it down, and then got ready to deliver the punch.
Except we all got punched first. Punch and Judy, perhaps?
The person who got up to daven musaf is; how to say this nicely; the person who is most likely to get me to walk out of this shul and only be part of a women’s tefillah group. If he is allowed to daven, it is a spit-in-the-face to me. If women are not allowed to daven because of what is the reason that you want to give–different degrees of halachik obligation (which means that women can’t fulfill an obligation of someone who has a larger obligation; this is really the only one that counts, I think), kol isha (not really a problem, but maybe for some then okay, it’s a problem) kavod hatzibbur (nebulous enough to make it cover all grounds)–then it is ‘way more than irksome that this dude can.
Bottom line; a shaliach tzibbur should be by definition representing the tzibbur, the group; he should feel part of that group, not above it. I thought that this was indeed part of the halachah. I don’t care about his feelings of his needs. Here is where the group comes first.
So, he gets up to daven and people groan. Then the husband does his thing. What’s a person to do? I laugh to myself, daven the silent Amidah, and then walk out so I don’t have to hear his repetition nor do I have to be quiet.
I roam the halls, tell kids to stop running (“You should not run ever in this building. I’m not making this up. You shouldn’t even run if there’s a fire [chas v’shalom] because you could get trampled.”), and yes, talk to a few people along the way.
When I think it’s safe to go back into the waters, I do and he’s done. The gabai came up to me at kiddush time to apologize. What’s the phrase? Better to apologize than ask permission?
Actually, according to here,
“If it’s a good idea,
go ahead and do it.
It is much easier to apologize
than it is to get permission. ”
Oh, let’s see now; what’s the operative word? And who decides what’s the good idea?