I can read back about what I wrote, why I started writing this blog. It’s probably changed. Yes, it’s still some kind of soapbox, but it clearly is more for my own self-discovery. Clearly.
So what have I discovered lately?
My hesitation to get involved in things is partly a “Wait! What am I supposed to do?” but it’s also a reasonable self-preservation. Our lives in the public eye with the husband as rabbi means that we are pretty much constantly bombarded with other people’s business. Not my family, not even close friends. When the kids were older but still at home, we had 2 phone lines, so basically it was possible to have these invasive conversations and hold private ones. When they left, we went with high-speed and one line. Yes, there are the cell phones, but that’s not the point.
The point is that I realize now that I kept things limited to limit our family’s exposure to the big crazies and to try to have some privacy. I don’t think it is a bad reaction. I think it was/is healthy.
(Parenthetically, isn’t it interesting how we refer to rabbis in the present tense? Or we constantly confuse the past and present?)
I spent time on kibbutzim, enough to know that the people who do best are either the ones who have nothing to hide or don’t bother hiding.
Not that I have anything to hide, mind you…