I saw this and I agree so much.
“Further, the fishbowl of the communal professional is not that different from the fishbowl of other jobs; only the scope is different:
If you want to teach schoolchildren, you need to be very careful about how you express yourself in the classroom and with parents.
If you want to deal with business clients, you need to be very careful about how you express yourself in meetings and communications.
And if you want to work for a community you need to be very careful about how you express yourself within that community, whether “on-duty” or “off-duty.”
Is it fair? I don’t know, but why does that matter?”
I always tried to tell my kids that if I expected them to act a certain way, it wasn’t because of the fishbowl (even though I would have said “being a rabbi’s child”). It was because of me. Or Halakhah, or both. But I would never make them do something just because what would people think. And I think they knew that, even if they thought otherwise at the time. Was it the best way to grow up?
I don’t know. But does it matter?